Weddings And Noses
It’s only natural to be nervous on your big day. But Richard had more to fear than most. Would Anna still marry him when he revealed he’d been wearing a false nose throughout their courtship?
It started as a test of her affection: "If she can love the man beyond this ridiculous false nose, she’s the girl for me". But now standing apprehensively at the aisle, Richard couldn’t banish the doubts from his mind. What if she loves the nose more than she loves me? Would they run off together? We’re supposed to go to Antigua on Monday – could the nose travel on my passport without the rest of me? Perhaps it’s just as well that over time the nose had fused itself to his face and was now a permanent feature.
Whatever fears he had dissipated when the blushing bride arrived with secrets of her own to reveal. It turns out she’d been wearing a wooden leg and a blonde wig since their first romantic date at the Mitsubishi Crash Test Dummy Ride. Now she stood as nature intended: a bald monoped, but at least she has a normal nose.
There was a momentary awkwardness, but when Anna stumbled at the alter Richard quickly stepped in to prop her up with his enormous plastic conk, and everyone knew it was a lasting match.
True Love prevails.